J. Edgar

A bit of a history lesson for those who may not know: J. Edgar Hoover was the head of the Bureau of Investigation (now the Federal Bureau of Investigation – FBI) from 1924 to 1972. That makes him one of the most powerful men America has ever seen. He was both admired and feared. Oh, did we mention the rumours that he dressed in women’s clothes in secret? 

Clint Eastwood and Leonardo DiCaprio team up to tell his story, and what a salacious story it is! Hoover lived with his mother till her death and had a close relationship with Clyde Tolson, the bachelor who inherited his estate. Hoover also mingled and kept secret files on the country’s most powerful people, including presidents and Hollywood stars.

If only all history lessons were this enthralling, maybe people would stay awake in those classes, eh?

Rating: 4 outta 5.

The Muppets

It’s been 12 years since Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy and the rest of the Muppet crew hit the screens but they’re back with a very nice bang! When I realised that “Flight of the Conchords” star Bret Mckenzie did the movie’s songs and Conchords director, James Bobin, directed this movie, I knew I would be laughing till popcorn flew out of my mouth!  Gross, but hey, these things happen.

The story revolves around Muppet fan, Gary (James Segel), his girlfriend, Mary (Amy Adams), and his brother Walt (who looks Gary in Muppet form). They head off on a journey from Smalltown USA to Hollywood to find out what became of the famous felt crew. They get caught up on a mission to stop an oil baron (Chris Cooper) from destroying the Muppet studios. Therein lies the birth of the Muppet reunion.

I reckon this take will make Muppet creator Jim Henson proud, like a mother who sees her child off to Grade one. Aw…

Rating: 5 outta 5.

The Darkest Hour

Somehow, most movies involving aliens portray them as foreboding creatures who want to destroy the earth and end human life. It happens so often that it does not even scare me any longer.

The only saving grace for this movie is the special effects. These aliens feed off electricity and they manage to turn any life form into ashes within seconds. Jaw, meet floor.

Emile Hirsch, brilliant in the movie “Into The Wild”, plays a young American businessman trying to strike a deal in the exotic location of Moscow. And Moscow does look oh-so-divine! He and his business partner meet two party girls in a club. But aliens, resembling glowing jelly fish, descend from the sky. Great actor that he is, even Hirsch cannot save this dismal script, bad editing and dodgy direction.

And anyway, whatever happened to friendly aliens, huh?

Rating: 2 outta 5.

Seeking Justice

Personally, action movies leave me walking out of the theater feeling cheated and very sleepy.  But I know that many out there will actually enjoy this movie because all you have to do is switch off, and immerse yourself in the entertainment value.

Nicolas Cage plays a school teacher, Will Gerard, whose wife is raped. At the hospital, a mysterious man offers him justice, as long has he can pay back the favour in the future. Against his better judgement, Gerard agrees. He begins his spiral down a vigilante group that seems to have infiltrated every aspect of the city he lives in.

Wake me up for the next movie, please. Zzz…

Rating: 1 outta 5.

Courageous

The scenario: Cops by day, fathers by night!

Tragedy strikes and these dads are left wrestling with their hopes, their fears, and their faith. But with any struggle comes resilience. Add in a good measure of action, drama, and humour and we have a flick that promises to "turn the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers".

This movie will leave you wanting to give your dad a huge hug. Go on…

Rating: 4 outta 5.

Underworld: Awakening

There are a few starlets who can pull off hard-core action roles, yet retain their femininity. Kate Beckinsale as Selene in the Underworld movie series is one of those starlets. And man oh man - she is back and raring to go!

This time, the fearless vampire warrior escapes prison, only to find herself endangered from humans. You see, they have found out about the existence of vampires and Lycans and are hell bent on destroying both species. Eek!

Be sure to give this one a watch.

Rating: 4 outta 5.

The Skin I Live In

Do you know that feeling, when you squirm in your seat and you’re not sure if you want to carry on watching a movie or not? Ready yourself for that with this flick! 

Antonio Banderas plays the widowed Dr. Robert Ledgard, a modern day mad scientist that makes Dr. Frankenstein look like Marry Poppins. Ledgard holds Vera captive and experiments on her – he wants to create a being with fireproof skin.  There is also Ledgard’s housekeeper, a man who dresses as a tiger seeking sanctuary in Ledgard’s lair (because all mad scientists have lairs) and another prisoner in the basement.

This is a disturbing but sexy horror that will become a creepy favourite for Halloween, if you can watch it till the end that is! 

Rating: 3 outta 5.

Machine Gun Preacher

A thug who loves drink and drugs changes his life 180 degrees to become a born-again Christian. He leaves his comfortable home in the USA and goes to Uganda and Sudan to do charity work. Sounds like a plot for a movie, eh? Oh wait – it is a movie, but one that is based on a true story.

Gerard Butler plays Sam Childers, who decides to build an orphanage in Sudan in the face of the terrible war and suffering he witnesses. But he clashes with rebel forces that turn boys into soldiers and girls into sex slaves. He takes up arms against them and gets the name of ‘machine gun preacher’.

While it is always good to see Butler on screen again, this movie is one that will fade through the memory banks.

Rating: 2 outta 5.

We Bought a Zoo

A dad decides that the best fresh start for him and his family is not to relocate to a new suburb but to move into a zoo. Yes, you read right, a zoo! With the help of an eclectic staff, the family work together to return the dilapidated establishment to its former splendor.

While this movie holds no surprises, it is a pleasant story that will leave you with a satisfied smile on your face and your faith in human kind restored!

Rating: 3 outta 5

Margin Call

Everyone is still living with the harsh legacy of the 2008 financial crisis. Wouldn’t you love to see how it all started?

This flick has a strong cast: Kevin Spacey as Sam, Zachary Quinto as Peter, Jeremy Irons as John and Demi Moore as Sarah. Together, they tell the strong, grim story of the 24 hours before hell broke loose. 

Eric is fired, and he hands over information to Peter.  An all-night emergency meeting is called, with CEO John. What ensues is a thrilling fight for survival, as individuals and for the company. If you already hated corporate greed before, this will make you loath it now.

Rating: 4 outta 5.

31 Million Reasons

Even though I have not seen this movie yet, it looks absolutely enthralling because it is always easy to identify with South African stories.

Isidingo’s Jack Devnarain plays Ronnie, a corrupt cop who wants to go clean. He takes part in one last cash-in-transit heist, and guess what? It is based on a true story. “The actual events upon which the movie is based took place in 1997 – they formed the inspiration for the movie, ” Devnarain said in an interview with a local newspaper.

Having been a cop for a few years, Devnarain performs his stunts himself. And that coupled with a high stakes crime is bound to leave you with goose bumps. 

Rating: 4 outta 5.

A Little Bit of Heaven

If you want to see Whoopi Goldberg act as the voice of God in a heaven filled with fluffy clouds glistened with the colours of the sun set, here you have it. Other than that, this movie is so predictable you don’t need be a psychic to know what’s going to happen next.

So, Kate Hudson takes on another rom-com – what a surprise! Here she plays Marley, a sassy, independent career woman (another surprise!). This time around she is diagnosed with cancer. But luckily for her, her doctor is the extremely smouldering Gael García Bernal and, oh surprise, he falls for her. 

Rating: 1 outta 5.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

Lisbeth Salander has got to be one of the most riveting, intriguing, fierce and complex heroines I’ve seen in a while. And you know what? I root for Team Lisbeth! She is an integral part of this who-dunnit, taken from the book of the same name and the 2009 Swedish movie adaptation.

A rich businessman requires the services of journalist Mikael Blomkvist to solve the 40 year old murder of his niece. Blomkvist and Salander are thrown into a damaged family of incestuous creeps, liars, killers and Nazis. 

The excellent cinematography is juxtaposed between a bleak wintry Sweden, and the warm hued past.

Now this is how a murder mystery flick is done…and sjoe, to think it is a remake!  

Rating: 3 outta 5.

A Dolphin Tale

Do you want a movie that leaves you with a case of the warm fuzzies? This is it! Inspired by the incredible true story of Winter, the dolphin who was rescued off the Florida coast after her tail was caught in a crab trap. 

Watch her fight to survive. See the immense compassion from the folks who band together to help her. Unless you want to be covered in ‘snot and trane’, be sure to take tissues with you - and don’t say we didn’t warn you!

Rating: 4 outta 5.

Footloose

When this movie was made way back in the 1980s, it launched the careers of a few stars, now respected A-listers like Kevin Bacon and Sarah Jessica Parker. I wonder if it will do the same for this cast.

The movie is about a city kid, Ren, who moves to a small town. There he finds that his two passions - dancing and music - have been banned because five kids recently died returning from a dance. Upholding the ban is Reverend Shaw Moore .

It is quite inevitable what happens next: Ren challenges the ban, fights for dance, encounters a dance-off and falls for Moore’s daughter Ariel. It is as clichéd chocolates for Valentine’s Day, but harmless fun too. 


Rating: 4 outta 5.

The Thing

Sigh, this is the third remake out of Movie Land this week – the other two being Footloose and The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. In fact, this is the third remake of The Thing: the first one came out in 1951, inspired by the writings of John W. Campbell Jr. then another in 1982. Sometimes original ideas should be left at just that.

So the premise of this story is that a group of researchers find an alien life form preserved in ice in Antarctica. Turns out it can take on anyone’s appearance which makes everyone super paranoid.  The alien goes on a killing frenzy and all we really see is a mesh of claws, teeth, goo and gore.

Rating: 1 outta 5.